I don’t like today

Warning: this post will contain self-indulgent moans and groans, accompanied by lashings of self-pity and ridiculousness. This post is in lieu of chocolate.

I had to take Scrumpy’s piglets to the vet the other day as they’ve got an eye infection. Poor buggers, scared the crap outta me, glad they’re ok, though they’re no longer pleased to see me when I turn up, on account of the fact that twice a day I grab them and put nasty stuff in their eyes.

Said infections and visit to the vet cost me £30.

It looks as though I’ll have to take Cookie to the vet tomorrow as she’s really not doing well at all. She’s been a bit “off” for the past few days and then wouldn’t come for her breakfast yesterday morning. Wouldn’t even get up. I gave her til lunch, but then she came racing up for some grub, and did the same at dinner. Phew, thoughteth me.

But this morning, she was back to not being interested. I picked her up, put her by the food and she was promptly sick everywhere. Lots. But then she staggered over to the water bowl and drank quite a lot and cleaned her face. I changed the water (well, she had managed to get sick all over her face!) and she drank some more, then staggered back to the ark.

I then had to abandon her to her fate as I had my induction for the new job today. Turns out I could have gone last week, despite not having access to my passport and NI number as a guy was allowed to do just that today.

But it turns out that the week’s wages I’m missing aren’t all I was lead to believe they would be – I was under the impression that I would be offered 16-20 hours. I’ve been offered 8.

Would I have applied for an 8 hour part-time job? Nope… But now that I’ve got it, I can’t top up the hours with a second job as I’ll be screwed for tax (been there before).

So my only option is to take the job, look for another, then just quit and hope that any future employment prospects don’t get fubarred by this decision.

The induction was meant to last two hours; I had to leave after three and a half, about an hour or so before the expected finish time. One hand and the other, and all that. You can imagine all the horrible thoughts that were racing through my mind about Cookie.

Went home to get changed and discovered that the dogs had trashed the place. Bins bags: shredded; cables for three multiplug extensions: chewed; bottle of bleach: chewed and empty…

I’ve no idea where the bottle came from, or how full it was before the chewing commenced. I couldn’t smell any bleach anywhere (found the empty bottle on the sofa) and there are no liquid spills so the rational part of my brain is assuming that the bottle was empty and the only reason it didn’t share the same fate as the bin bags is because they tasted the bleach and changed their minds.

The irrational part of me is convinced they’re about to drop dead and keeps waking them up every time they fall asleep.

The fact that they’re leaping about like demented badgers on crack doesn’t help me make my mind up. This could just be the first sign of bleach poisoning. I’ve tried the vet, but there’s no answer.

I abandoned the chaos in the flat, waded through the bin bags and drove back to the farm, convinced that Cookie would have breathed her last either by the time I got there, or moments after.

Although she was not at all interested in lunch, she has been spotted up and about and has drunk lots of water, including out of my cupped hands, which would be really sweet if it were not for the circumstances.

Tia will not be getting any rolled barley with her tea as my theory is this: I don’t know why she wasn’t hungry yesterday morning, but having skipped breakfast, lunch probably didn’t do enough or her and by tea she was very hungry indeed. So she probably overate, then when Tia left her bowl to see if the piglets had finished, Cookie probably licked the bowl clean. Tia rarely finishes, and one or more piglets usually helps themselves to her leftovers. But never Cookie, as that would involve leaving the food in front of her and competing with the others for what could be an empty bowl. Why bother?! However, there appeared to be broken bits of barley in her vomit, so I think she did get to the bowl and went to town on it. But because her system was unused to the food, rejected it this morning. So, just in case, Tia can forgo this pleasure for a day or two, just to avoid any repeats.

She’s probably got indigestion and all the water she’s drinking will do a much better job of flushing out her system than solid food. I also noticed this afternoon that she’s got a muddy nose, which means she’s been eating mud in order to get the minerals and vitamins her body needs.

I could be horribly wrong, and that thought is one that will keep me up all night. That, and the dogs.

The neighbour’s daughter hung around this afternoon while I was doing the pigs. That’s fine, as she’s a lovely girl, really polite and genuinely interested in the animals and how to look after them. Asks loads of questions, but they’re all really intelligent and she listens to the answers, considers them, then asks another questions to build on what you’ve said. If you’re gonna have a kid hanging around, she’s the one you want.

Unfortunately, her really really REALLY annoying friend was with her and this is the kid you want to shove in a fast flowing river. Never listens, always talks over you, won’t do what she’s told. The one who asks if she can do something and doesn’t understand why you’ve said no. The one who thinks that piglets and dogs are there for her to pick up and play with – god forbid they should have lives of their own! I could go on about why she was so annoying this afternoon but instead I’ll enjoy my quiet revenge. Walking to the pigs, I took the muddiest route. My lace up boots stayed put. The neighbour’s kid’s crocs stayed put. Annoying Brat’s silly sandals kept sliding off and she got her socks covered in wet, squelchy, very smelly mud. Well, I did tell her to follow my footsteps but she knew better…

Then I remembered it’s Sunday so can’t indulge in some comfort food (ie chocolate). Unless I drive around to find an open garage. And that just smacks of sheer desperation. Though it’s not such a bad idea…

Nope, not a good day at all.

10 responses to this post.

  1. Oh dear. Sounds like you deserve some chocolate, imho!

  2. Honey sweetie – have some plumple jam – it makes the world a better place! And I’ll make something chocolatey for you this week I PROMISE! (cross my heart and hope to die, and I wouldn’t say that lightly given what I’ve been through this past week!). I’ll try and get up to visit the invalid soon, and look on the bright side, with fewer hours you can visit us more and eat more of my food!

  3. Andrew: my B was wonderfully fantastic and bought me lots 🙂 And I didn’t eat all of it, which makes me feel even better!

    Jennie: Yummy yummy 🙂 Though it turns out that I jumped the gun somewhat. I’m not doing 8 hours, just 8 hours this week, then it’s (I think, need to double check this in case I’m wrong) 20 hours as of next week. So if you’re about any evenings this week, let’s get ’em in quick!!!!!! Oh, and the plumple jam was amazing, had lots, don’t want to finish it too quickly.

  4. Posted by welshpurpletree on 13 October 2008 at 10:09 am

    Oh dear, sounds like you’ve had a terrible time. Hope the dogs are ok, and Cookie makes a full recovery.

  5. Welshpurpletree, Cookie’s still a bit dodgy but looking more lively so the phone call to the vet is still on hold. She was sick again this morning, bless her, but she did get up and wanted her food so I think she’s still flushing out her system. I hope. I’ll feel terrible if I’m wrong…

  6. Forgot to say, the dogs are fine, so I think my rational guess was correct and had it been a better day, I wouldn’t have let my habit of overreacting get in the way :/

  7. Posted by welshpurpletree on 13 October 2008 at 12:48 pm

    Maybe Jennie’s lurgy can jump to pigs?

  8. Oi! Don’t blame me! And you’d better not join in, Jo, or i’ll take back the cross my heart thing and chocolate cake will be OFF!

    So when you coming round? (not Wednesday, we have parent’s evening!)

  9. Did you see me joining in? Didya?

    Am working Tuesday and Thursday so Friday?

  10. Yup, think that should be fine. Talk to you soon anyway xx

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